A Homeschooling Story

Some have been forced into it, others have wanted to do it for a very long time. No matter how you look at it, it is happening and there is no way around it.

Truth comes from authority; intelligence is the ability to remember and repeat; accurate memory and repetition are rewarded; non-compliance is punished; and conform: intellectually and socially. In my humble opinion, these are the things that the education system teaches children. Don't believe me? Let's take a deeper look.

"Intelligence plus character... that is the goal of true education." ~ Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

I don’t have any personal experience with being homeschooled as a child. I am a product of the public school system. You may ask what gave me the desire to do something as outrageous as homeschooling my own children? I was almost always a straight ‘A’ student throughout my school years. Every club and every sports opportunity that was presented, I took advantage of it. There was nothing that I hated about school but as I got older and began to send my own children off there were things that my family began to experience that caused me to dislike the public school system.

I've had not one but two children who were placed in special education classes because they would not conform to the indoctrination of the classroom. Since they chose to think outside of the box, or they had an opinion that was contrary to popular belief, my children were subject to punishment and removed from the general education classes. When one of my children did not catch on to a certain lesson quickly enough, teachers and school administration began to label this child as needing additional supports. This was very true... Two of my children did need additional supports and they needed someone who would be able to work with them one-on-one. This was not because they were unable to learn or to remember but simply because God made them different. They were punished and made to feel less than normal by those who were in a position to teach, encourage, and cultivate their minds. Needless to say, after months of meetings and seeing that even with being placed in the special education program my children did not begin to excel but in turn began to decline in their motivation and love of learning, I decided that something needed to change.

Ever since my children were young I’ve known that I wanted to homeschool them. It was the strangest thing because I had not personally known anyone who had done such a thing up until that point. I even went as far as homeschooling my older girls who are now ages 16 and 14 years old and heading to the 11th and 9th grade for the upcoming school year. The only reason I stopped homeschooling for a period of time was because of going through a divorce and having to work outside of the home to provide for my family, which left me with very little time, energy, and support to even think about continuing to homeschool. On top of that, I couldn’t see how anyone, including me, could realistically homeschool their children while also being the sole provider. However, the desire to homeschool never went away. In fact, it only got stronger over the years. Although the thought of working from home full-time took me completely out of my comfort zone, I truly believed that it was God's way of giving me the grace to be able to homeschool my children again and for good this time.

My 14-year old has struggled to stay afloat in the public school environment since she was a little girl. She is more of a kinesthetic learner who needs to touch things and move around often in order to truly learn a subject and make sense of things in her mind. Unfortunately, this way of learning is not typical or encouraged in most public schools. These types of children are usually looked at as a disruption in the classroom setting and placed in special education even though there is nothing developmentally or intellectually wrong with them. I also struggled with putting my second oldest back in public school because, by the time in question, she had already experienced her fair share of being bullied so that was a real concern for me.

I struggled for a while with whether or not to send my eldest daughters back to public school however instead of making my children’s decisions for them, I tend to include them in conversations and let them have a voice in how we proceed in most situations that concern or will affect them. This time was no different; a choice was given and a decision was made. If they stayed in school it would be because we had weighed all possible outcomes, they were prepared for the journey ahead, and because we believed it would be the best choice for them. Ultimately, the girls expressed their own desire to continue being homeschooled so that eased my mind and eradicated my internal struggle.

To me, homeschooling is more than just being able to teach my children of our Christian values. I won't lie, that is definitely a major part of it but there's so much more. It is being able to have my children learn in ways that really allow them to master a subject and not just merely memorize the correct answers for a test. I desire to foster a love of learning and a mindset where they take initiative to find their own answers and think outside of the proverbial box. Life will be more than tests and I believe that homeschooling better prepares our children for this world beyond school. Let's face it, many adults can barely remember algebra or even what an adjective is. When our 3rd grader brings their homework home and asks us to help them with it, we sometimes have to Google what ‘this is’ and what ‘that is’. Maybe I am just speaking from personal experience but this is proof that much of what we learned and even how we learned it was simply substandard. We studied to pass tests; there was never any emphasis placed on mastery of most subjects and that is unacceptable.

I am by no means saying that there aren’t great teachers in the public school system, because my children and I have been blessed to have had some of the best teachers this world has to offer. I am just saying that public school is not for everyone. Likewise, homeschooling is not something that will work for every child or their family. I do think we must weigh the pros and cons of these major decisions and truly understand how each could affect our children’s lives and their future endeavors. Either way, I am prepared to step into the role of a single, homeschooling parent. Although I rarely see or hear about single parents taking on this role, I believe that when God calls us to do something He also equips us with the tools we need to do it. With His grace and leading, I know that everything will work out according to His will and I am excited to continue this journey.